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Hangover Chronicles: III

This was a weekend of spontaneity. Thursday night, my best friend and I decided to road trip to Gainesville, Fl first thing Friday morning. One of my other best friends & sister go to school there, so we had plenty of places to stay so last minute. We also had nothing school-related to worry about because of #Irma. RIP.

Friday night was a shit show (in the best way possible); drinks were $0.50. Yes. Fifty f*cking cents. Needless to say, everyone I was with ended up extremely drunk. Saturday morning’s hangover was masked by a harsh reality: Game Day. I woke my hungover ass up at 8:30 a.m. and tried to shower the pain away. It helped a little. So did my leftover pizza and Aleve.

Game Day came and went, and plenty of platties (common college lingo referring to Bud Light Platinum- a less shitty version of the classic tailgating beer) were consumed… along with a shot of Aguardiente that I had to try really hard to keep down. That hangover I tried to suppress was slowly creeping its way back into my life- and I knew I’d soon be miserable. I tried napping before going out at night- but my headache was massive. I put my big girl pants on, ate some pasta, and got ready to go out. I went out with my little sister and her friends, which was interesting. Sidenote: let’s all get past the champagne shower phase. No one likes being wet and sticky in the club. Literally no one.

Keep reading to laugh at my Sunday morning misery.

Not only was I extremely hungover on Sunday, but I had to drive five hours back to Miami. Thank the Lord my friend drove down the whole way- I wouldn’t have made it.

We walked downstairs from my sisters apartment to find my friend’s car had been towed. Freaking awesome, right? We waited inside a Publix (the Publix that had our car towed- NOT a pleasure if you ask me) for my sister to come scoop us up to take us to the towing company. Suddenly, an unavoidable wave of nausea came over me. I knew it. My time was done. I found the bathroom and immediately started puking in the toilet. There was someone in the stall next to me and I felt so bad that she was listening to my throw up sounds. That in it of itself would have made me puke. She’s a trooper. I puked a lot and when I walked out of the stall, my eyes were bloodshot, teary, and I looked like defeat. I composed myself (as much as I could) and was gifted with the presence of a cute kid I went to high school with. Goals, right? I shoved a croissant down my throat to absorb any left over stomach acid and my sister pulled up outside. We picked up my friend’s car and went to eat breakfast.

I’m about to tell you a secret. Don’t tell anyone, promise? My hangover was still so bad at this point that… I… ate bacon. I know. I’m terrible. I was too hungover to be a vegetarian. I would have DIED without the bacon. Dramatic? Yes. Necessary? Absolutely.

Warning: graphic image below

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My hungover self in the car on our way back home. Good look for me, isn’t it?

There you have it- part three. We made it back to Miami safely and soundly, and I’m currently still sleep deprived. Hope you enjoyed laughing at my misery. Laughter is the only way to get through it… or not drinking- but no.

Shotgun a beer in my honor your next game day!

Stay thriving,

Nicki G.

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Hangover Chronicles: II

If you’re reading this, then I managed to survive yet another terrible hangover. Why was I hungover on a Monday, you ask? Because everyone knows Sunday Funday is one of the best trends going around & I might be diagnosed with FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). I had to go. I just had to.

I attended the famous Kiki On The River to start my night of fun. We ate, we drank, and we had a great time. I’ll make sure to dedicate a post about their food and dining experience one of these days. As if endless frozé (see: frozen rosé) wasn’t enough, my friends and I decided to make an appearance at a new club Mr. Jones on the beach. Been there? Maybe- it’s where SET Nightclub used to be & I see it being one of my new favorite clubs. Side-note: the club was slammed and it was a Sunday night… do you people not have responsibilities? Let me be you!

After a heart to heart conversation with my Uber driver & getting home at 4 a.m. to a very annoyed mother, I knocked out.

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Actual text from my mom. Sunday Funday- that’s why!

Waking up to gardeners outside my window this morning was fun. My friend slept over, so luckily I didn’t have to do this alone. After many thoughts and considerations, I decided that being vegan and surviving this hangover were two things that didn’t go hand in hand. One had to go, and I wasn’t planning on dying today. Stay tuned for a post on my vegan experience soon to come.

It seemed like an eternity went by before the pizza was delivered. I ate some, (which did not sit well AT ALL… how could you do this to me, cheesy goodness?) and was somehow convinced to NOT be a couch potato all day. A few hours of nausea and dehydration at its finest, I somehow managed to hold down my stomach contents and didn’t throw up. I did almost throw up in the Sushi Sake bathroom, though, but again I escaped that horror.

It’s 10 p.m. and I think I’m now getting over my hangover. Either that or I’m just so tired & I can’t tell the difference between my exhaustion and usual shitty hangover.

Stay thriving (and I will too),

Nicki G.

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Hangover Chronicles: I

If you know me, you know I get the worst hangovers. Literally hours over the toilet not even being able to hold down a few sips of Gatorade. Why? I’m not sure. Maybe I did something really bad in a past life. So here I am, stuck suffering from horrible hangovers even if I only have a few beers.

I figured I’d make a series of my hangovers so other people can laugh at my misery, cause what’s better than laughing at other people’s problems (that sounds so bitchy, but  it’s so true)? So here’s chronicle I- and it’s perfect, ’cause I’m not dying.

I saw my husband (Drake) at Story Nightclub last night, so needless to say, I was drinking with friends & having a great time. I ended up alone, doing my own thing, of course, because NG (see: drunk alter ego) loves to wander. Before I knew it, I was getting phone calls from my friends telling me they were outside. When did it become 4 a.m.? I obviously had no idea how to leave this club, so I was asking every bouncer for directions and finally convinced one to walk me out and help me find my friends. Once found, we Ubered home and went to not one, but TWO different McDonald’s to find out they were closed. We ended up at Taco Bell (gross) and the only thing I could eat was cinnamon twists because #vegan. Side-note: I asked if they had hash-browns and the cashier was very confused. I also stuck my entire body out the window and yelled while ordering my Baja Blast Freeze. Idk. I was excited.

So here I am today, one Baja Blast Freeze and order of cinnamon twists later. I slept a good four hours before waking up starving and with my full face of makeup. I drove my ass to Chipotle with my friends to try and settle my eager stomach and ate a good seven bites before wanting to throw up (I didn’t, though, so yay me).

Today’s chapter isn’t bad, I’m just extremely exhausted. Consider this a warm up for what’s to come. My mom’s probably pissed. Sorry. Whatever. Enjoy following my hangover chronicles and feel free to laugh.

Love, your favorite Hangover Queen,

Nicki G.

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P.S. Follow me on Twitter for live-action tweets of my nights. They’re half annoying, half hilarious. @nicki_gee. And if you’re lucky enough to have me on Snapchat, sorry.