An Open Letter About Nothing In Particular

Hey, you. How have you been?

My mental space has been so shitty these last few weeks, so if you’re feeling this way too, trust me you are not alone. For me, the past couple of weeks have been weirder than the first few months of this whole pandemic. Things began reopening, and it brought more anxiety than it did normalcy.

Oddly enough, when this all started I was taking the time stuck at home to spend time with my family, my boyfriend, and most importantly, myself. While I’m still doing all of that, I feel that the time for myself has slowly dwindled away. Actually, that I’m not giving it as much TLC as it deserves. I’m not eating as healthily as I should be, and I’m not working out as much as I was. I just don’t feel like it. I’m unmotivated to exercise, and I feel sleepy and groggy a lot of the time. Why? I’m not sure. I guess it’s a normal part of life- we have good weeks and we have weeks that we’re just out of our grooves.

If you’re feeling out of your groove too, you’re not alone. It’s easy to compare your lack of motivation to everyone online that seems to be doing the most- trying new recipes, awesome at-home work outs, and cute date nights with their s/o. I don’t want to try a new cauliflower recipe- I hate cauliflower. Although I love exercising and trying new workouts, these last two weeks I haven’t felt like burning one more calorie than I had to. My Lulus have been used for sitting on my couch or going to Target (for what? who knows). Work is exhausting and I feel it in every fiber of my body. Send help.

The issue is comparing ourselves to everyones “portrayed” life on Instagram. Don’t get me wrong- I’m the first person to post stuff on IG and spend a ton of time scrolling through my feed, but sometimes it’s fine to want to log off and just do nothing. Can anyone else relate? I’ve also had zero motivation to write- something that I genuinely love doing. It just seems like there’s nothing to write about. I don’t want to write another coronavirus post. By now you should know: stay the fuck home unless you have to, and if you’re going to go out, keep a social distance and wear a damn mask. And to everyone thinking, “but I saw you going out!,”: I went to dinner and to brunch, both times with the same small group of people, taking the proper precautions, and to places taking appropriate precautions as well. If you’re going to go out, be smart and considerate about it.

I guess I’m just out of my usual groove. I need something to get me back into it. The weather here in Miami also hasn’t helped. Who the heck wants to do anything when it’s raining? Not I. If your head feels cloudy, don’t worry, mine does too. Even online shopping hasn’t helped, so we know this is a serious issue.

What are somethings you do when you find yourself in a rut? I’m asking for me and for anyone else who may need some help getting out of one. Leave tips in the comment section below. I’ll send some virtual hugs for anyone who helps.

Love always,

Nicki G.

2 responses to “An Open Letter About Nothing In Particular”

  1. Hey Nicki G, Paola D here
    Sometimes it’s okay to be in a rut. Let it sit. It will pass. If it doesn’t, set some limits and maybe that will get you motivated. Read a little, do some really beginner yoga just to get moving, or do nothing. I’ve found that helps me the most if I’m ever feeling funky/not myself for a bit.


    Liked by 1 person

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